If you’ve ever wondered which hobby might secretly boost your dating appeal, the answer might surprise you. Forget buying a flashy car or signing up for adrenaline-fueled skydives. According to a recent survey, the most attractive hobby a man can have doesn’t involve danger, high cost, or even much movement—it simply involves picking up a book.
That’s right. A quiet afternoon activity that can be done on your couch just might make you more intriguing to potential partners than all the high-energy sports or Instagram-worthy adventures combined.
The Survey That Spilled the Tea
The findings come from Date Psychology, a research platform that studies trends in relationships and attraction. In their latest survey—later covered by the Daily Mail—they asked women to rank 74 different hobbies from “most attractive” to “least attractive” for men.
The result? Reading claimed the top spot with an almost unanimous vote—98.2% of respondents said they found it appealing when a man enjoys reading.
Considering that survey-based preferences often vary wildly, this level of agreement is rare. In a dating world where opinions can be as varied as people’s coffee orders, the fact that nearly every respondent agreed on this says something.
Read more: 10 Relationship Red Flags in Women, According to Experts
Why Reading Might Be So Magnetic
Reading isn’t just about turning pages—it’s a hobby that hints at deeper qualities. A man who reads regularly may be perceived as:
- Curious – He wants to learn more about the world.
- Focused – He can immerse himself in something for more than a few minutes.
- Self-reliant – He can entertain himself without needing constant external stimulation.
- Thoughtful – Books often inspire reflection and deeper conversations.
And, of course, there’s the romantic image: sitting in a café, sipping coffee, eyes lost in a novel. It’s not hard to imagine someone glancing over and thinking, “What’s he reading? And does he have good taste in stories?”
Mini-Vignette: Reading
Picture this: It’s a rainy Saturday afternoon. You’re at your favorite coffee shop, curled up in an armchair, reading a worn copy of a novel you love. A woman at the next table notices the title and smiles—it happens to be her favorite book, too. A conversation starts. Hours later, you’re still there, discussing characters, themes, and life itself. All because you picked up a book instead of scrolling your phone.
The Rest of the Top Five—Attractive in Their Own Right
While reading may have won gold, the rest of the top hobbies form a lineup that could easily pass for a “most eligible bachelor” profile.
1. Learning a Foreign Language
Ranking second, this hobby scored big points for signaling curiosity and adaptability. It’s not just about speaking—it’s about understanding a whole different way of thinking.
Learning a language takes time, patience, and effort, which communicates dedication. Plus, it comes with practical benefits: ordering in another language while traveling, connecting with people from other cultures, and enjoying foreign films or music without subtitles.
Vignette: You’re on vacation in Spain, sitting at an outdoor café. Your travel companions fumble with menus, but you confidently order everyone’s lunch in fluent Spanish. The waiter smiles, your friends look impressed, and someone says, “I didn’t know you could speak Spanish.” That moment of quiet competence? It’s attractive.
2. Playing a Musical Instrument
Third place went to music—a universal language of its own. Whether it’s guitar, piano, violin, or drums, playing an instrument suggests a mix of discipline and creativity.
It’s not just the performance—it’s the hours of practice, the patience to improve, and the joy of expressing emotion through sound.
Vignette: It’s a summer evening. Friends are gathered in the backyard, and someone brings out a guitar. You start playing a few familiar songs, and soon everyone’s singing along. No stage lights, no ego—just music that brings people together.
Read more: Therapist Reveals 6 Habits That Make Couples Feel Truly Emotionally Secure In Their Relationships
3. Cooking
Fourth place went to cooking—a hobby that’s both practical and sensory. Cooking well suggests planning, creativity, and the ability to care for oneself and others. It’s also an act of sharing, since meals are often enjoyed together.
Vignette: You invite someone over for dinner instead of going to a crowded restaurant. The kitchen smells of garlic and fresh herbs. By the time dessert arrives—something you made from scratch—it’s clear the evening is about more than just food.
4. Woodworking
Fifth place went to woodworking. There’s something timeless about shaping raw materials into something useful or beautiful. It’s tactile, patient work that results in something tangible you can point to and say, “I made that.”
Vignette: A friend mentions they need a small bookshelf. Two weekends later, you surprise them with one you built yourself—smooth, sturdy, and smelling faintly of cedar. It’s not just a shelf—it’s a story.
Other Hobbies That Made the “Attractive” List
The survey didn’t stop at the top five. Other hobbies that scored well include:
- Painting – Creative expression that requires patience and vision.
- Writing – Crafting stories or essays that reveal imagination and thoughtfulness.
- Photography – Seeing beauty in the everyday and preserving it.
- Astronomy – A mix of science, wonder, and late-night stargazing.
- Hiking – Combining physical activity with an appreciation for nature.
- Blacksmithing – A skill that’s rare, physical, and oddly medieval.
- Archery – Precision, focus, and just a touch of adventure.
The Thread That Ties Them Together
Look closely, and these hobbies share certain traits:
- They require effort. You can’t fake proficiency in woodworking or archery overnight.
- They produce something—tangible or experiential. A song, a meal, a photograph, a handmade object.
- They encourage conversation. A shared interest can spark long discussions.
The Other End of the Spectrum—Hobbies That Hurt Your Chances
Not all hobbies inspire admiration. In the same survey, some activities consistently ranked low, with many respondents labeling them “unattractive.”
These included:
- The Manosphere – Online communities with a reputation for negative, anti-women attitudes.
- Watching Adult Content – Often seen as emotionally disconnected or superficial.
- Gambling – Associated with financial risk and instability.
- Constant Online Arguing – Suggests negativity or stubbornness.
Even hobbies like crypto trading, cosplay, collecting comic books, or Funko Pop figurines didn’t fare well with the majority of respondents—despite being perfectly valid interests for some.
Heavy drinking and clubbing also landed in the lower half. Dating coach Courtney Ryan pointed out that when alcohol becomes a primary hobby, it can signal immaturity or a lack of deeper interests.
Reddit Reacts—From Jokes to Genuine Insight
When the list made its way to Reddit, users responded in two main ways: humor and personal stories.
Some poked fun at the old-fashioned feel of the list:
“Archery? Did they survey Elves? Blacksmithing—so basically Dwarves, right?”
Others shared real-life experiences:
- Meeting a partner at an archery range.
- Bonding over photography during a hiking trip.
- Connecting at a local book club.
Many noticed a trend: The top hobbies tend to involve creating, learning, or exploring—things that make life richer. The bottom hobbies often involve passivity or isolation.
The Core Message: Do It For Yourself
Here’s the twist—trying to “pick” a hobby purely to seem attractive is often counterproductive. The most consistent advice from both Reddit commenters and dating experts was this:
Choose a hobby you genuinely enjoy, and the appeal will follow naturally.
Passion is magnetic. If you love what you’re doing—whether it’s cooking, reading, or learning a new skill—that enthusiasm is more attractive than the act itself.
Read more: 12 Subtle Behaviors That Reveal a Man Isn’t as Nice as He Pretends to Be
Final Thought
So yes, according to this survey, cracking open a book might just help you crack open a conversation with someone new. But the bigger takeaway is that engagement with life itself—through curiosity, skill, or creativity—is what people are really drawn to.
And who knows? The next time you’re lost in a novel, strumming a guitar, or carving a piece of wood, someone might just be watching… and thinking, “That’s interesting. I’d like to know more about him.”
